Author: Siel

  • Five firsts: Rob Roberge on on binge writing, craft, and realistic expectations

    Five firsts: Rob Roberge on on binge writing, craft, and realistic expectations

    Every month, I interview an author I admire on his literary firsts.

    April’s featured author is Rob Roberge, author of The Cost of Living, a wild ride of a novel starring Bud Barrett — guitarist of an indie rock band — who goes from reckless days of touring and partying with strangers and hiding his drug addiction to getting sober and confronting the traumas and mistakes of the past.

    Rob’s most recent book is Liar, a memoir with many similarities to The Cost of Living. He’s also authored three other works of fiction: Working Backwards from the Worst Moment of My Life, More Than They Could Chew, and Drive.

    In this interview, Rob talks about the vital role played by indie publishers in the literary marketplace, binge writing, and the difference between memoir and fiction drawn from life.

    Sign up with your email below to be entered to win a copy of The Cost of Living — and to get notified of future interviews!



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    Siel: We have one thing in common as writers: We both have books with Red Hen Press! Yours, a short story collection called Working Backwards From the Worst Moment of My Life, came out in 2010. So this question is a personal one: What is the one piece of advice you’d have for a writer who’s just published a book with an indie press?

    Rob: I’d say that there’s no one in the indie press world who isn’t in it unless they love books and love keeping the community of literature going. No one goes into indie publishing hoping to make a living at it. So, trust that—despite the fact that the press (any of them) may have limited resources for promotion and the like—they care deeply about you and their book. Some books gain traction in the marketplace…some don’t…but know that the press wants all of them to…for their sake and the writer’s sake.

    So, I guess my biggest piece of advice would be to be realistic about the reach a book may be able to have. It’s not a question of quality. Indie presses are putting out some of the best books out there these days. With the death of the mid list on the trades, it’s come to indies to pick up those books by respected career writers who haven’t hit big in the profit-driven business model of the trade publishers. And on the new untested but great writers. This is an important gift for writers. And readers. That books that matter have a home and are still out there and available.

    Your first book, Drive, came out in 2001. How has your writing routine changed, if at all, in the years between then and now?

    I had more time then. Or maybe more energy. I was younger. I could do a lot of things at once more than I seem to be able to now. My health was better. But those are all minor things in the big picture. I still seem to get work done. I finished a book in two years that came out in 2013 (The Cost of Living), and then finished another in under two years that came out in early 2016 (Liar), so I guess I still get my work done.

    The routine hasn’t changed too much. I’m a binge writer, not an everyday writer. I go long periods (especially when I’m teaching a lot) without writing books. Then, when I’m deep into a project, eight to ten hour days are normal…5000 to 10,000 word days aren’t NORMAL, but they happen. Sometimes I have written for anywhere from 24-72 hours (though I’m not supposed to with my having bipolar disorder…it’s not so wise…so I don’t do it much anymore. It sets off bad patterns).

    I’ve always sort of wanted to be an everyday writer. But it just doesn’t seem to be the way I work.

    At your launch reading for your latest book, Liar, you mentioned that your work has gotten more and more autobiographical. Why do you think that is? Is it a simple function of age — or something else?

    I’m not sure. But I think (well, I know) it’s over. As each novel got progressively more autobiographical, that led to doing the memoir where I figured I’d just cop to the fact that a lot of my writing was about me by…well, writing overtly about me. But that seemed to be the end of a period in my writing. A phase that’s over. No more first person. No more basing protagonists on me (at least for the foreseeable future). My new book that I’m working on covers fifty years and 6 points of view…all lives very different from mine. It seemed time to move on.

    On that note — The fictional protagonist in The Cost of Living has quite a lot in common with your characterization of yourself in your memoir, Liar. In fact, some plot points even repeat in the two books! As you were writing these books, were you picturing more or less the same “character”? Or were the two “protagonists” of these works very separate and different in your mind?

    I pictured them as separate…even though they covered a lot of the same ground. They both are musicians, recovering addicts, have pretty severe bipolar. So, there’s a lot. But, for one thing, the structure was radically different. And I’m a big believer in form not just influencing content, but on some levels being content. The Cost of Living wasn’t a novel that challenged the form of the novel in any way (which was fine). But in Liar, I was trying to do things structurally that I hadn’t seen other memoirs do. Whether it was successful for not is for other people to decide. But that was a goal. And it made them pretty different projects, even though they shared a lot of details.

    Which of your books was the most difficult to write?

    Liar, by far. For both the reasons above and for personal reasons. It was the most challenging from a craft standpoint. And it was the one where I had to be most naked and vulnerable with the reader. Hardest by far. Maybe not the hardest to write (they’re all hard), but by far the hardest to release.

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    Purchase a copy of The Cost of Living now, or enter to win one by signing up for the newsletter. Already joined up? Then you’re already entered!

  • Five Firsts: Me on voyeurism, desire, identity

    Five Firsts: Me on voyeurism, desire, identity

    Cake Time by Siel JuSo usually I post a monthly interview with an author I admire whose book I’m giving away.

    But since I’m giving away my own Cake Time this month to celebrate its publication, I’ll take this opportunity to link to interviews with me in other places and hope that you won’t think that’s too narcissistic!

    These are both amazing lit zines that deserve your time and attention. Thank you to the interviewers for featuring me and my work —

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    Michelle Ross at Fiction Writers Review: This sensation of watching one’s life from outside the self, like it’s a theatrical performance, is a running theme in your book. And I think it’s a sensation to which we can all relate to some extent or another. Would you talk a little bit about this in terms of your novel as a whole? Why does this topic interest you?

    Me: …. I think it’s because this sense of watching one’s life from outside the self seems very self-effacing — in a I-cannot-bear-to-be-truly-present-for-this-experience-type manner–yet simultaneously, very self-indulgent — in a I-like-to-spend-my-time-watching-film-clips-of-myself kind of way. It’s both an erasure of the self and an obsession with the self.

    More at Fiction Writers Review.
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    Shilpa Argawal at Angels Flight • literary west: The book has a voyeuristic feel; you invite us into very intimate moments, and you don’t sugarcoat them. You write, “I started really watching him, hard. And as I bore my eyes into him, I could sense a shift in him, too … I was frightening him.” Sexual encounters fade into a parody of themselves. Characters shift under the unflinching gaze of the protagonist, who misses nothing. Would you say this is the point of view of the book?

    Me: I love this question — it really points to the voyeuristic experience of reading for me, this desire as a reader to watch the characters go through the experiences of a story and feel a part of that experience by proxy. It makes me wonder if living is all that different from reading, especially when both modes can evoke the exact same thoughts and emotions.

    More at AFLW, where you can also read “The Robertson Case,” a story from Cake Time.

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    I’m currently in Portland on book tour — and will be at Powell’s on Hawthorne tonight, chatting with Kevin Sampsell! Then it’s off to Belligham, Seattle, after which I return to LA for more events. I hope to see you at one of them — Please come say hello!

  • Five firsts: Louise Wareham Leonard on secrets and thinly-veiled memoirs

    Five firsts: Louise Wareham Leonard on secrets and thinly-veiled memoirs

    Every month, I interview an author I admire on her literary firsts.

    March’s featured author is Louise Wareham Leonard, author of 52 Men — a thinly veiled memoir written in tiny, flash pieces. Each of the 52 snippets features a guy with whom the narrator had a relationship — some affairs brief, some longer, some intimate, some cruel.

    The book is sexy as well as scary, tender as well as crude — making for a riveting read. Relatedly, Louise runs 52 Men the Podcast: Women Telling Stories About Men. Each 10-minute episode features one woman writer telling, well, a story about men. My story ran on the podcast earlier this year!

    In this interview, Louise talks about autobiographical fiction, the shame of secrets — and Milo Yiannopoulos.

    Sign up with your email below to be entered to win a copy of 52 Men — and to get notified of future interviews!

    Enter to win!


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    Siel: I’m curious about the writing process you took to complete this book. The 52 short flash pieces take place over a lifetime. Is this a book you worked on in bits over decades, or within a more focused period of time?

    Louise: I was living with my husband in the outback of Western Australia, in the deep desert, as far from the New York City life I grew up in as I could get. We were there a year working for the aboriginal people, and others, and in that time my past life seemed a total dream to me – that chemical madness dream Fitzgerald talks of. All these faces and their stories kept flashing at me from the sky, speaking to me, and I just had to write them down.

    Why 52?

    A Trappist monk I met last year — who is also the poet John Slater — read the book and said, “Louise, here are 52 of the men you’ve known — now you have the other one hundred thousand.”

    I think he grasped the idea that the number was random, or maybe that 52 cards in any pack is a good enough amount to play your game.

    Relatedly, will there be a sequel?

    They say that white people picked their constellations out of stars, but the aborigines in Australia picked theirs out of the pattern the darkness made. My 52 men are just the white shining surface. Right now, I am working on exploding the entire terrain. So yes, there’s something coming that’s related, though it is far more open and expansive, a change for me.

    52 Men ends with a longer story about a girl who has a sexual relationship with her older step brother — at first as a young girl who’s being molested by him, later as a woman, consensually. This story goes to all the uncomfortable, murky, in-between places around consent, desire, and power — and because it does so, is very different from most of the neater, more binary abuser-victim stories we hear regarding sexual abuse. Did you have fears about the reaction to this story when you put it out into the world, especially considering the growing popularity of the “yes means yes” type rhetoric that tries to define consent and rape in definite, clear-cut terms?

    I think it’s clear that when a child is ‘turned on to’ sex – whether a girl or a boy by, say, a priest, that child has been sexualized. However, for me at least, it’s not always what happens physically, exactly, but how it happens and what emotions it causes: particularly shame and self-loathing and the feeling of powerlessness over one’s own body and self.

    That Elise forgives this guy Ben, the older stepbrother in the story, is her big mistake. Or not that she forgives him, but that she trusts him, forgets that he has consistently done her harm and could do so again. She’s young there, and naïve and foolish.

    At the end, however, when she discards his letters, I think she has faced the truth about him – that he is weak, not she.

    My ultimate point is that Ben is essentially a weak man. He lets down his step-sister by abusing her in childhood, then he lets her down later when she gets pregnant and he runs away. Abusers often, oddly, really are weak boundary-less unevolved people.

    Maybe they are manifesting other people’s problems, or maybe some evil has them captive – but that’s being generous to them.

    I was not of age to give consent; nor, by the way, was Milo Yiannopoulos who recently, perhaps unwittingly, dug his grave by saying how great it was for him to be molested at 14.

    One thing I think helps a lot is to see that both in my case, and in Milo’s the relationship was secret. If it’s secret, there’s shame — and when there is shame, there is either abuse or betrayal, yes?

    Even among thinly-veiled memoirs, 52 Men stands out to me as a book taken very much from life. Dubbed “autobiographical fiction” in the description, your book includes cameos by well-known men. Why did you choose to make and call this book fiction instead of memoir?

    Even if someone abused you, I don’t think you have the right to destroy them. Not unless you have gone to court. It just doesn’t feel fair to me. People can apologize, and change, and though I believe in outing lies, and abuse, I am no one’s punisher — let alone for life.

    Then again, some might say I am protecting my abuser, and my family. The day I stop doing that, which could be very soon, unless my abusers get a bit nicer, lol, it’ll be called memoir. 

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    Purchase a copy of 52 Men now, or enter to win one by signing up for the newsletter. Already joined up? Then you’re already entered!

  • Five Firsts: Julia Scheeres on reshaping trauma & exposing injustice through writing

    Five Firsts: Julia Scheeres on reshaping trauma & exposing injustice through writing

    Every month, I interview an author I admire on her literary firsts.

    February’s featured author is Julia Scheeres, author of Jesus Land — a searing memoir that tells the story of Julia and her adopted black brother David, both of who were not only taunted by racist peers at school but abused and neglected by their religious, punitive parents at home.

    As I mentioned before, the book takes a fascinating and disturbingly close look at key social issues that still plague us today: racism, sexual assault, and child abuse carried out in the name of god, both in the quiet secrecy of family homes and the formalized settings of religious institutions.

    Julia more recently wrote A Thousand Lives: The Untold Story of Jonestown — another page-turner that tells the story of why close to a thousand people followed a religious leader — despite his descent into alcohol and drug abuse and psychosis — to end up committing “revolutionary suicide” in the 70 (my microreview here).

    In this interview, Julia talks about why she decided at long last to tell her story, how both nonfiction and fiction can address life’s great questions, and what we must do to fight bigotry and injustice, especially in today’s political climate.

    Sign up with your email below to be entered to win a copy of Jesus Land — and to get notified of future interviews!



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    Siel: Having been brought up by very religious and punitive parents myself, reading your memoir Jesus Land was an extremely personal and visceral — even cathartic — experience for me. I was awestruck by your decision to write about your experiences with such candor and detail — especially because I have the opposite inclinations as a writer. I tend to resist writing about my formative years altogether, and even when I write about my experiences, I’m driven to heavily fictionalize them.

    Are we just wired differently, or did your willingness / desire to write about these experiences change as you gained more time and distance from them? To put my question more briefly: What compelled you to write this memoir? Because I’m very glad you did.

    Julia: That’s a sorry coincidence – as in, I’m sorry. I bet a whole rash of writers emerge from such circumstances. What better childhood than one lived in constant fear of supernatural forces and one’s paddle-swinging parents to foment a writer? Most writers spend their lifetimes obsessing over and reshaping the traumas of their youth. For many, it’s the strife of our formative years that compels us to become writers.

    Had I lived my experiences alone, I probably would have been content writing thinly veiled autobiographical fiction. But because I witnessed my brother David – who was, as you know, adopted and black – suffer greatly at the hands of these Bible verse-belching believers, I wanted to create a record of his life. A testament of sorts. What drove me was a need to “set the record straight,” so to speak. Thus I did not change the names of the adults in Jesus Land because I thought that the adults abusing children in the name of God – in my home and at the “Christian therapeutic boarding school” we were sent to – should be held accountable for their actions.

    I’m guessing that after the publication of Jesus Land, you were inundated with emotional, sometimes even desperate emails and letters from people who’d gone through similar experiences. Some of my friends who’ve written memoirs that deal with heavy topics (e.g. childhood sexual abuse) have mentioned the difficulty of responding to these readers with kindness while simultaneously managing their own time and emotional needs by keeping a professional distance. Do you have any advice or strategies for other memoir writers who are seeking to find this balance?

    Indeed, the amount of reader mail was overwhelming at the beginning! LONGGG emails detailing years of the writer’s personal problems and challenges. I didn’t expect that. At first I tried to respond to each one, but then got into an endless back-and-forths with readers and answering email became a full-time job. Finally I put a note on my website’s homepage thanking readers for reading Jesus Land and letting them know that, as a full-time writer and mom to two young kids -– I simply don’t have time to respond to every message, although I do read them all. That seems to have done the trick.

    But I do still get several messages about Jesus Land a week, 12 years after publication. It humbles me that my book touched such a deep nerve with some readers. One reader told me she finished the book and had a “tremendous urge” to embrace my brother David – that really moved me. That’s why I wrote the book – so there’d be a record of his life and struggles. I felt vindicated when I read that.

    After Jesus Land, you wrote A Thousand Lives, which tells the story of the Jonestown massacre — another riveting true tale that explores issues of religion, race, and abuse. Which was easier for you to write, your own memoir or the third-person story?

    Emotionally, my memoir was MUCH harder to write. Although the Jonestown story had tough elements – such as the fact that 1/3 of the murdered residents were minors – it wasn’t my life I was writing about. It was more of a journalistic challenge than a personal one. It took me a full year to read through the 50,000 pages of FBI files and figure out how to structure the book.

    In your introduction to A Thousand Lives, you write this: “I believe that true stories are more powerful, in a meaningful, existential way, than made up ones.” As a fiction writer myself, I have to ask: Do you still believe this statement, six years after its publication? Also, what happened to the novel you were working on before you took up A Thousand Lives?

    Ha ha. You caught me. Okay. Funny thing: I’ve gone back to writing fiction now, although a different book than on the one I was working on when I started “A Thousand Lives.” I needed to take a break from sad stories and write a book that ended on an upbeat note. It’s hella fun to make shit up. I do think nonfiction has that “wow-this-really-happened” element that fiction lacks. But I think fiction can address life’s great questions just as eloquently, and in certain situations, perhaps more so, than creative nonfiction.

    Reading A Thousand Lives — with its focus on Jim Jones, a monomaniacal, uncontrollable, and erratic leader who led hundreds of people to their untimely demise through lies and psychological warfare — was quite the scary experience, post Trump’s election to the presidency. You’re an author who has looked deeply at the factors that allow someone like Jim Jones rise to power. I realize this is a big question, but what suggestions do you have for exposing deception, fighting tyrants, and retaining our grip on reality?

    That’s a YUGE question. A lot of what went wrong in Jones’ church, Peoples Temple, happened because people ignored that gut feeling that something wasn’t right and didn’t speak out. And once he had them trapped in the middle of jungle, it was too late. They were doomed.

    I live in the bubble that is Berkeley, CA, where everyone I know is a progressive liberal like I am. I’m glad to see the push-back after Trump’s election — the marches and protests against his parade of bigotry and untruths. I think we need to continue to raise our voices and be LOUD and unyielding. I’m raising my two daughters to be outspoken advocates for justice – in fact they marched in a Black Lives Matter march when the older was 4 and the younger still an infant. The beauty of social media is that we can find like-minded people and organize and keep resisting. And as writers, to use our talent to expose bigotry and injustice wherever we find it.

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    Purchase a copy of Jesus Land now, or enter to win one by signing up for the newsletter. Already joined up? Then you’re already entered!

  • I’ll be at AWP in DC signing and reading from Cake Time

    I’ll be at AWP in DC signing and reading from Cake Time

    Will you be in Washington DC later this week? If so, let’s catch up! I’ll be signing books — and reading — and singing karaoke — at the AWP conference, and hope to see your friendly face —

    AWP, for those who don’t know, stands for Association of Writers & Writing Programs — a professional organization for writers with a focus on college and university writing programs. Each year, AWP has an annual conference that brings many thousands of people together, and this year that conference happens February 8 – 11 at Walter E. Washington Convention Center in Washington DC.

    And I’ll be there! First, about the book signing: Officially, Cake Time isn’t out until April 6, 2017 — but early copies of my novel-in-stories will be available at AWP! Please come by the Red Hen Press booth — # 412/414/416 — to check out a copy and say hello. I’ll be there all three days:

    * Thurs, Feb. 9, 11:30 am – 12:30 pm
    * Fri, Feb. 10, 10:30 am – 11:30 am
    * Sat, Feb. 11, 11 am – noon

    (more…)

  • One book review in Los Angeles Review of Books

    One book review in Los Angeles Review of Books

    Visit Los Angeles Review of Books today, and you’ll find on the front page a new book review I wrote — “To Be Young, Rich, and Screen-Addicted: Lindsey Lee Johnson’s The Most Dangerous Place on Earth.”

    Here’s a little excerpt:

    Although the teens in The Most Dangerous Place on Earth never grow up enough to contend with a world beyond their own lives, the novel effectively highlights the perils of sharing anything personal or meaningful today. Anything you say or do can be uploaded onto Instagram, dissected on Twitter, ridiculed on Facebook — the private has become public in a very different way.

    Read the rest at Los Angeles Review of Books!